"Nondual society"

Someone I know mentioned "nondual society".

The idea of a society is an idea. The concept of nonduality is an idea. An idea about an idea about an idea is also an idea. The mind is a labyrinthe; if one enters, it may be hard to find the way out. *smile*

When the search ends

When the search for truth comes to an end, life is more like a flow of activity(s) rather than a reflective/contemplative/focused search. With nothing to search for, other interests come to the foreground and replace the past interest in searching. The most important interest after the search ends is helping other people see through the same illusions that were once so blinding to oneself. I have met lots of people whose search came to an end, and every single one of them consider helping other searchers as their highest interest. Clearly, THAT is what THIS likes to do. *smiles* 

Kensho

The basic definition of "kensho" is a "seeing into one's true nature." Hakuin, a famous ZM, described all kinds of kensho experiences from small subtle ones to huge mind-boggling cosmic consciousness ones. The main point is that kensho is an EXPERIENCE. Any time the bottom drops out of one's mind, selfhood vanishes, and clarity ensues that's a kensho-type experience. Sooner or later those kinds of experiences come to an end and one returns to ordinary life.

Many Zen people, as noted by Wiki, equate kensho and satori, but I do not. I consider satori something quite different--a realization that ends the spiritual search. That realization is the sudden (timeless) seeing through the illusion of the searcher so completely that it changes one's understanding about what's going on. The search ends because it is seen that the imagined searcher was not the real searcher. The operant searcher is realized to have been Reality, Itself, and the illusion of a "John" or "Jane" having been the searcher collapses. This realization changes everything. Life continues, but there is no longer a person at the center of what appears to be happening. The body/mind, universe, and awareness continue as before, but it is empty of personhood. 

After this realization, any previous self-identity like "John" or "Jane" is seen in a new light, as an abstract thought structure that was so ingrained in the organism that is was continually overlooked. 

The most interesting question is, "What happens after this realization occurs?" Well, life continues just as before, but without the illusion that there is a separate entity at the center of it. The body/mind goes about its business doing whatever needs to be done, and knows that the real actor is the totality of "what is." The body/mind lives without knowing what will happen next, and is comfortable with that not-knowing way of life. 

Zen Masters emphasize the importance of continuing zazen after satori because they think that formal zazen, such as shikan taza, is what led to their freedom from the consensus trance. A few of them seem to realize that it is attentiveness to "what is" that freed them from the mind's domination, but only a few. 

Is it necessary to remain attentive after satori? Probably. People who stop being attentive to "what is" often fall back into a mind-centered way of life, and the old sense of selfhood sometimes re-emerges. Gangaji doesn't like the idea of "practice", but she has often said, "Vigilance is necessary." I think what she means by that is what I'm pointing to. Most adults spend 99.9% of their time attending thoughts, and they stay lost in the concensus trance. If one becomes free of the trance, probably some minimal amount of time needs to be spent attending "what is" in order to keep the mind from regaining dominance. FWIW, I've never read anything specific about this issue, so this is just speculation.

When I reflect upon the "Ten Ox-Herding Pictures" of Zen, it seems to me that what I'm calling "satori" is represented by the eighth picture. This means that there are two further stages of development/integration/understanding that Zen Masters point to.

Oneness is a direct experience.

When it occurs, "you" are not there. The experience makes it obvious that reality is a seamless unity and that the universe is centered at every point. That which sees is the only thing that sees because it is the only thing here. Obviously what's being pointed to is not a thing because it has no boundaries, but we can use the word "thing" to point to that thingless thing. The body retains the memory of the experience, and there is never any doubt about the unity that was experienced. It is not held as a belief in the mind because it is a direct experience, and is directly known through the body.

Does it matter? Well, it eliminates the usual fear of death because it is seen that the unified field of all being is never born and never dies; it is infinite, and all life forms are simply momentary manifestations of that infiniteness. Humans do not worry about their condition before birth, and one glimpse of the infinite takes away all worry about their condition after death. It is not so much that the infinite is seen as it is an experience of being one-with the infinite or being lost in the infinite because all boundaries are absent during the experience.

This kind of experience (without an experiencer) is somewhat different than realizations in which various assumptions/ideas/beliefs are seen to be false. Seeing through the illusion of selfhood, for example, is a realization rather than an experience. When it is seen that selfhood is a fictitious idea, only, what then remains? The body/mind, universe, and awareness. Life continues, but there is no longer the idea or belief that there is a separate person at the center of what's happening.
 

Segal, Roberts and UG

I often recommend Segal's "Collision with the Infinite" because it has a peculiar and often beneficial effect upon seekers. Her writing about her loss of selfhood helps many people see-through various deeply-held beliefs and thoughts about selfhood and/or existence. How this happens I don't know, but I can think of many people who have been strongly affected by her book, and all of them were affected in what I would call a positive way. 

UG has always struck me as an odd character--sort of an ultimate contrarian with a chip on his shoulder about Jiddu and several other teachers. At the same time he's kinda funny, and there is probably some value in considering what he has to say, if only to challenge whatever beliefs someone may have. 

Bernadette Roberts's first two books interested me, but then she sort of wandered off into some mindset where she felt obligated to reconcile her interior experiences in some quasi-Christian way. I lost interest in her because she never seemed to have reached any kind of psychologically-unified way of being. For whatever reason she seemed to overlook the fact that ordinary everyday life (free from the dominance of thought or special experiences) is what this path is all about.

What ATA does

For most people inquiry walks hand in hand with attending the actual (ATA). It's like putting attention on something other than thought and letting a deeper aspect of mind (non-verbal, non-linear, holistic, etc) reveal what is already the case. The answer to whatever question we have is already present, but it often goes unseen. ATA sort of relaxes the intellect and allows the obvious to become obvious.

Finding answers to existential questions

...is equivalent to seeing through the questions and realizing that they are all based on misconceptions. If we let go of our ideas, we watch life unfold without knowing. Most people want to know; not knowing isn't very popular. To paraphrase Shakespeare, "To imagine or not to imagine? That is the question.

Who we ARE

...is every creature that is currently alive and every creature that has ever lived anywhere in this or any other universe. We are every gnat, worm, midgen, mole, mammoth, fish, dinosaur, or human being that has ever lived or will ever live, but we are even more than that. We are every tree, star, comet, galaxy, drop or water, or puff of wind that had ever existed or will ever exist. Why think small about this matter? Ha ha.
 
It helps to realize that the universe is unimaginably intelligent and has its own ineffable plan of action. If this is seen, then one can relax and simply BE in the secure knowledge that everything is taken care of. Humans are apparently the only creatures on earth who imagine that they are separate entities who have control over what happens. This illusion creates all kinds of unnecessary psychological worries. 

Melville, in his novel "Moby D*ick," presented a great koan when he had Captain Ahab raise his arm and ask, "Is it I or God who lifts this hand?" Seeing the answer to this question helps put the mind at rest. (hint: it isn't "I" and it isn't "God.")

Pointers

Words are crude little things when used as pointers, so if they don't resonate, throw 'em away. Ramana's silence may be the best pointer, but even he finally started using words as pointers for people who didn't see where the silence was pointing. "Be Still and know that I am God" is a great pointer from the Bible, but millions of Christians can't see where those words are pointing. My words in the prior posts were simply expanding upon the same theme.

The Zen novice is instructed to sit down and watch the breathing process. I expand that advice to include ATA throughout the day. Both activities require psychological presence, and both activities help people come out of their minds and back to reality. As I've noted before, when attentiveness is pursued, it is pursued under the illusion that there is a "someone" pursuing it. Many people practice meditation for years, and never see through that illusion because they think that the activity is special and that they are "making spiritual progress." Until it is seen that the do-er is a product of imagination, they remain trapped in a vicious cycle.

Ego

I wouldn't say that ego/false self can think, feel, act, and sense because it simply doesn't exist. There is only one actor on the stage. It may appear to think, feel, act, and sense, but this is an illusionary appearance created by mistaking thoughts ABOUT reality for reality, itself. Source falls into the dream of its own creation by focusing upon thoughts rather than "what is."

Every set of eyes

Who/what you are is what looks out of every set of eyes. There is only one here, and that one is what sees everything. Who you think you are is a figment of imagination. The real you is unbounded but centered everywhere at once. Each moment who you are is both appearing and disappearing in trillions of life forms. When you look at an ant, you are looking at yourself; when you look at a tree, you are looking at yourself; when you look at another human being, you are looking at yourself; when you look at a star, you are looking at yourself. It sounds incredible, but you're bigger than you can imagine! As Walt Whitman wrote, "I am vast; I contain multitudes."

Confidence in oneness

Confidence arises from direct experience. If you stub your toe on a rock, there is no doubt about what happened. 

If you have an experience of cosmic-consciousness, you directly experience oneness, so there is no doubt that any sense of separation is an illusion. Even after the experience ends, it is remembered, so the certainty of what happened and what was realized never goes away.

If you have an experience in which selfhood disappears, even for a short period of time, there is no doubt that such a thing is possible.

If selfhood is seen to be non-existent, as a realization rather than an experience, there is never any doubt about what was seen. 

When gaps between thoughts first appear, the mind usually thinks, "Oh, silence has appeared," but that thought breaks the silence. Eventually, silence can occur and be known without any words or thoughts appearing. Sustained silence makes it obvious that discursive thinking is not necessary for most daily activities. 

Cumulatively, a wide range of direct experiences and various realizations regarding the nature of reality generates considerable confidence concerning how mind generates the illusions underlying the trance-like state of mind most people mistake for reality. 

Until someone tastes a lemon, one does not know how a lemon tastes. 

Until someone directly experiences the vastness of the Infinite, one does not know what the word "infinite" points to. When the Infinite is directly experienced, it is not experienced by a separate person; the Infinite experiences Itself through some unknown faculty of perception that is not conceptual/intellectual. Any body/mind through which that occurs never forgets what happened, and always feels deep humility, awe, and reverence concerning what happened and what was perceived. In Christian terms any body/mind that experiences God directly never imagines that s/he IS God. The body/mind is conceived, whenever it is conceived, as an infinitessimally tiny fragment of being that is one-with the vastness of God. 

AAR, that's my story, and I'm sticking to it! Ha ha

Belief structures

Many belief structures are extremely deep. They are so much a part of our way of seeing and interacting with the world that they go totally unrecognized. After fifteen years of silent retreats and experiments with dozens of meditation techniques, I still felt like there was a "me" that needed to find a way to stay in a unity-conscious state of mind. Only when the "me" was seen to have vanished and to have been a figment of imagination in the past did the search finally come to an end. Only then did it become obvious what had motivated the search for truth--the deep belief/idea/sense/set-of-thoughts/story that there had been a separate "me" who needed to understand reality. Only then did it become obvious that what I AM is Reality, Itself. The dog had unknowingly been chasing its own tail. ha ha.

As an experiment, you can stop for a moment and look around. Imagine not knowing the name or concept of anything. It isn't possible to know what's looking, and nothing in the field of view is known, conceptually. There is seeing, and what's seen in obvious, but the mind is totally silent. There is no name or concept for what is seen. The past is not remembered, the future is not imagined, and even the present is not imagined as a point in time. There is only "what is." No distinction is possible because the mind is momentarily inert and inactive. Take a few moments to walk around and look at the world in this state of empty unknowingness. Even if the mind jabbers a bit, ignore the jabbering and just look. This is the world that sages and little children live in. Even the tiniest glimpse of that world may help shift one's perspective somewhat.

Washing the dishes

If someone is washing dishes (the proverbial example-ha ha) with full attention, there is only the truth of *scrub scrub scrub*. The idea that there is a person washing dishes is an idea. The idea that time is involved is an idea. The idea that something is occurring is an idea. The idea that something needs to be done after doing the dishes is an idea. *scrub scrub scrub* or "look look look* or "listen listen listen* is the path to freedom.

It is impossible to be other than "what is"

...or to move a millimeter away from being "what is," but most folks are distracted by their thoughts and jerked around hither and thither, psychologically. The path of discovering the living truth is ignoring distractive thoughts and becoming still enough to see what is already the case. 

John WL apparently had a cosmic consciousness experience, and searched, unsuccessfully, for other people who had both experienced his unitive state of mind and also understood the implications of it. Many people have such experiences, but very few people go far enough to see, understand, and then internalize the implications. Bottom line? Who we are is "what is" manifesting momentarily as human beings. Cosmic consciousness experiences and everyday life experiences are all part of the seamless continuum that constitutes "what is." All separateness is an illusion. Shifting attention away from thoughts to "what is" leads to freedom from the mind (mind as servant rather than master) and becoming comfortable living in the emptiness of "what is" as "what is." One/Oneness then lives an ordinary life free of expectation, desire, or self interest. If grace appears, grace. If humor appears, humor. If sadness appears, sadness. If suckiness appears, suckiness. 

Not knowing is the Way.

Contemplation

The body/mind has a way of resolving/dissolving all kinds of issues. If one simply sits in a chair, and silently contemplates an unresolved issue, it will sometimes come to the surface in a most surprising way, be seen in a completely different way, and subsequently evaporate. In a way, it's like getting in touch with the deepest aspect of one's being, and allowing the truth to become so obvious that it can't be ignored. In the past I have purposely sat and contemplated an unresolved issue, and had this sort of thing happen. 

One time it required five hours of contemplation before the truth suddenly became obvious. At other times I have hiked uphill (a favorite activity) while contemplating an issue, and had the same thing happen. In each case it was a matter of bearing in mind, without thinking, what I wanted to know or what I wanted resolved. It is somewhat different than ATA because it is a form of directed contemplation. I suspect that this is similar to what a scientist does who has exhausted all avenues of thought, has learned everything possible about a problem, and simply bears in mind the issue that needs resolution. In the case of scientist we call the resulting breakthrough a "eureka experience." In the case of an existential issue, we call it a "kensho experience" or "an epiphany."


Gangaji often tells people to sit and feel everything associated with a particular issue. Invite any shame, guilt, embarrassment, remorse, worry, regret, etc. associated with an issue to become fully present where it can be fully felt. Then, just feel it. In many cases, the intensity of this exercise will lead to a sudden burst of unexpected laughter. 

On one occasion a woman talking with Gangaji said that she was horribly afraid of becoming old, poor, and alone. Gangaji asked, "Why wait? Why not be old, poor, and alone NOW." Gangaji told her to shut her eyes, invite all of her fears to become present, and then feel it fully. The woman sat in silence for several minutes and then suddenly burst out laughing. When the woman stopped resisting her fears, they were suddenly seen to be a kind of headtrip with no real basis in reality.

Reality unfolding

Reality unfolds in whatever way it unfolds, and there are no separate persons behind the activity. It is empty. In this sense no one ever makes a mistake, and everyone/Reality is always doing whatever s/he/IT does. Carol and I often laugh about our past "mistakes" by saying, "Well, it seemed like such a good idea at the time." ha ha. Most builders and contractors have "done stupid" with zeroes on the end of it, so it helps to have a good sense of humor. Mistakes only appear to be mistakes when looking backwards. 

The real issue is "What's happening NOW?" If there is attention upon "what is," and the mind is quiescent, regret, remorse, embarassment, and guilt disappear. Thinking about the past or future in any repetitive way is just a bad habit. The old adage, "Let go and let God" is good advice. Relax and let everything be as it is.

If this can't be done, then try Byron Katie's "The Work" and find out whether the thoughts that are being believed about the past are really true (hint: they're not). 

Buddha

He left his family (wife and two kids) in the middle of the night, went searching, met lots of spiritual teachers, tried all kinds of stuff, starved the body, got nursed back to health by some young woman, kept searching, meditated more and more, felt like he was getting close to the truth, sat down under a pipul tree and vowed not to get up until he understood, and a few days later had a huge woo woo experience upon seeing Venus in the morning sky. His search began when he was 36 and lasted six years. His time under the tree was relatively short. He taught for about 40 years before dying after eating some tainted food.

The Buddha was a real thinker and talker, and he had a disciple who had a photo-aural memory. After the Buddha died, his main disciples got together to assemble the story of his life and record his dialogues. Someone once told me that the written record is eleven times longer than the Bible. Some of his sermons were brilliant and concise, but some of his dialogues would put most people to sleep. He meticulously dissects various questions and analyzes them socratically and tediously. He had lots of highly unusual encounters with people, and taught dozens of parables similar to those of Jesus. 

Koan self-tests

Such a "self-test" could be a compilation of dialogues between sages. If a dialogue were understandable, then the self-testee would know that s/he understood what was going on. Similarly, koans could be presented on one page. The testee would be invited to answer the question. On the following page there would be numerous answers (typical of the kind people usually imagine or think up) that do not penetrate the issue. If the testee saw his/her answer on the following page, s/he would know that the koan had not yet been penetrated.

Here's an example from "The Recorded Sayings of Layman Pang:" 

One day Chan master Tan-hsia Tien-jan came to visit the Layman (a famous enlightened sage who refused to accept any formal title). As soon as he reached the gate he saw the Layman's daughter Ling-chao (who was as enlightened as the Layman) carrying a basket of greens.
"Is the Layman here?" asked Tan-hsia.
Ling-chao put down the basket of greens, politely folded her arms and stood still.
"Is the Layman here?" asked Tan-hsia again.
Ling-chao picked up the basket and walked away. Tan-hsia then departed.
When the Layman returned a little later, Ling-chao told him of the conversation.
"Is Tan-hsia here?" asked the Layman.
"He's gone," replied Ling Chao.
"Red earth painted with milk (an expression denoting that an action is needless, useless, or defiling)," remarked the Layman.

Or this:

One day when Po-Ling and the Layman met on the road, Po-ling asked the Layman, "Have you ever shown anyone the word by which you were helped (to reach enlightenment) by Shih-tou?"
"Yes, I have shown it," replied the Layman.
"To whom?" asked Po-ling.
"To Mr. Pang," said the Layman pointing to himself.
"Certainly you are beyond the praise of even Subhuti," said Po-ling.
"Who is he who knows the word by which you were helped?" asked the Layman.
Po-ling put on his bamboo hat and walked off.
"A good road to you!" called the Layman.
Po-ling did not turn his head.

A teacher holds out her hand, then slaps the floor, and then asks, "This hand (holding out her hand), and the sound of this hand slapping the floor; are they the same or different?"

Incorrect answers would be "same," "different", "neither same or different," "both same and different at the same time," (stands up, turns around, and sits back down), "2 plus 2 equals 4." 

Who was the neurosurgeon (in the father/son koan)? Incorrect answers would be "a Catholic priest," "his stepfather," etc.

There could also be a series of questions without answers. If a person understood how to answer them with no hesitancy, then s/he would know that s/he was fairly free from conceptualization.

1. What is the soundless sound?
2. How many hairs are on the back of your head?
3. What does "and a good night to you" mean?
4. How many sides does a perfect sphere have?
5. Why is the sky blue?
6. Why do you have ten fingers?

It might be fun to compile such a self-test and let some folks on this path try it out, and then try it again a year later to see if various questions that were previously unanswerable became answerable. 

Hoffer and Osmond

everal years ago Hoffer and Osmond, two Canadian orthomolecular psychiatrists (shrinks who tend to see most serious psychiatric patients as people who suffer from altered brain chemistry), developed a written test designed to distinguish schizophrenics from non-schizophrenics. I think its called the Hoffer-Osmond Diagnostic Test, or something like that. The test if pretty cool because it can also be used by people suffering from neuroses, depression, or anxiety. The test can be self-administered, and it can be taken while referring either to the present moment or the past. For example, a person suffering from extreme anxiety can take the test, and answer the questions as they apply in the present. As time goes by, s/he can take the test again and again and see if his/her score is rising or falling (whether they are improving or getting worse). A "normal" person will have a very low score, perhaps 25. A severely depressed or anxious person will have a higher score, perhaps 40 or 45. Schizophrenics will have very high scores, which indicate how badly their perceptions of reality are skewed. Schizophrenics who score high, perhaps, 110, and then receive medications, can take the test repeatedly and their docs can watch the scores fall as the meds help bring them back to a more "normal" way of perceiving reality.

I've often thought that a similar test could be devised that could be used to self-test one's clarity regarding existential issues. This is essentially the way the Rinzai school of Zen uses koans. After ZM Seung Sahn had his big breakthrough in understanding, he went to see ZM Ko Bong. Ko Bong began asking him koans to see how clear he was. ZMSS effortlessly answered all of ZMKB's questions until he encountered one question that he couldn't answer to ZMKB's satisfaction. Supposedly they sat face to face for a long time without speaking before SS finally saw-through the koan. SS was the first person that KB sanctioned as a ZM, and SS was only 22 years old at the time. After SS spent some time as a chaplain in the Korean army, he returned to KB's monastery. KB took one look at SS, and said "You have Army eyes! You need to be silent for a year." 

Reading the dialogues of some of the early Chan Masters from China is interesting because, like the HO test, one can see if one's understanding is changing over time. Dialogues that are utterly opaque when first encountered, gradually become more and more transparent as one spends more and more time silently contemplating and interacting with "what is."

How do teachers survive?

Most of the big names in non-duality live off the proceeds of foundations established in their names, but there are a lot of lesser-known teachers who hold regular jobs and have families. Many of them work in the fields of counseling, psychology, or psychiatry (for obvious reasons), but the rest of them work in jobs as varied as country music, academia, construction, and writing. Several teachers are supported by income from the books they've written. Some are multi-millionaries, and at least one them owns several airplanes. 

Tolle

The story is fascinating. He didn't understand what had happened to him until several years later after he had read spiritual texts and talked with some spiritual teachers.

He theorized that the intense pressure of his suffering caused his consciousness to withdraw from its identification with the unhappy and fearful self. He writes, "The withdrawal must have been so complete that this false, suffering self immediately collapsed.....What was left then was my true nature as the ever-present I AM: consciousness in its pure state prior to identification with form......Later I also learned to go into that inner timeless and deathless realm that I had originally perceived as a void and remain fully conscious. I dwelt in such indescribable bliss and sacredness that even the original experience....pales in comparison. A time came when, for a while, I was left with nothing on the physical plane. I had no relationships, no job, no home, no socially-defined identity. I spent almost two years sitting on park benches in a state of the most intense joy.
But even the most beautiful experiences come and go."

There is a CD or a tape where he talks about his life during those two years, but I can't remember the title. He left England with almost no money and travelled to Vancouver. There, he wrote "The Power of Now," and a local publisher printed 3000 copies. The book became famous by word of mouth, and eventually it ended up at the top of the NYT bestseller list. I seem to remember him telling an interviewer that after his experience, he lost all interest in his academic job and quit. His needs were almost non-existent after that, so perhaps he lived on whatever money he had left over from his teaching job. If someone else remembers the interview where he talked about that period in his life, perhaps s/he can post a link or recount the details. 

The stink of enlightenment

Some of this "stink" comes from the euphoria that often accompanies kensho experiences, and some of it comes from an incomplete or incorrect understanding of what has happened. Most commonly, a person thinks, "I've become enlightened," and starts telling other people about all of the amazing discoveries s/he has made. When this happened to Hakuin, he went to his teacher, told him about his amazing realization, and his teacher then hauled off and knocked him on his a*ss! Ha ha. Hakuin had two or three more such experiences before his teacher quit making fun of him. 

Every situation is different. After Tolle got sucked into the "vortex," he came out amazed and humbled. He stayed in a blissed-out state for almost two years, but never seems to have exhibited the egoic exuberance that Adyashanti refers to. We have witnessed one or two people on this forum who developed delusions of grandeur after they had some deep insights, but fortunately this doesn't happen too often. 

Most people who have had such experiences usually look back after a few years and feel a bit embarrassed at their over-the-top behavior after the event. As Adyashanti says, it is a very common experience on this path.

Scrabble

There's a wonderful story somewhere written by a guy about something that happened when he was a ten-year-old child. He was playing Scrabble with some older siblings, and as he lost money and properties to the other players, his throat began to constrict, and he began to feel such fear and anxiety that he could barely breathe. Suddenly, he realized that it was all just a game, and there was no reality to it. It was like having an enlightenment experience. He jumped up, exhilarated, and yelled, in essence, "It's just a game!" He then began laughing riotously, and ran off leaving everyone totally perplexed. No one had any idea what had happened, but the boy left the game, went outside, and rolled around in the grass laughing and giggling with joy. Such is the power of mind and the power of seeing through projections of mind

Divided or unvidided

As soon as anyone thinks "undivided" or "divided" s/he's already made a mistake. The task of a sage is to keep pulling the rug out from under people until it is realized that there is no solid ground to stand on. When it is finally realized that there is no solid ground to stand on, then where is one standing? For folks who travel this path far enough there is a simple concrete answer to this question. It is the difference between being guest or host.

Once upon a time a young seeker visited a famous sage.
The seeker said, "I've come for instruction."
The sage asked, "Where did you come from?"
The seeker responded, "I've come from (a particular) southern province."
The sage replied, "You ricebag! How could you possibly have come from a southern province?"

This exchange reportedly opened the seeker's eyes. 

More koans

I rarely contemplate koans anymore, but occasionally some old unanswered koans will arise and be seen through. It's always a surprise when this happens. The first koan in more than a decade that captured my interest was one that I recently read in "The Zen Teachings of Huang Po." Apparently, Huang Po (600 AD?), was talking to Nan Chuan (incorrect spelling, but I don't have the book with me). Nan Chuan, a deeply-enlightened master, asked Huang Po where he was going. Huang Po said, "To cut some vegetables." Nan Chuan then asked, "What will you cut them with?" HP silently held up a knife. Nan Chuan replied, "Well, that's okay for a guest, but not for a host." HP realized the depth of this comment, and the inadequacy of his reply, and he did three prostration bows to show his respect.

This story stunned me, and prompted some serious contemplation. 

This story is exactly like the story of the ZM who was walking with his advanced student when some geese flew overhead. The ZM asked the student, "Where have they flown." The student replied, "Master, they're already flown away." The ZM then suddenly grabbed the student's nose, twisted it violently, and said, How could they possibly have flown away?" 

When I read the Huang Po story, I could imagine a sage asking, "If you had been there, how could you have answered Nan Chuan's question satisfactorily?" IOW, HP made a mistake when he held up the knife. That "answer" isn't bad, but the understanding/realization behind that answer is far from what NC was looking for.

"What are you going to use to cut them (the vegetables) with?" "Where have they (the geese) gone?" These are heavy-duty questions, and it's the same underlying issue (though more explicit) that you raised with Stillness concerning his statements about Source never being in conflict. How does one stop responding as a guest and manifest as Host? How does one go from outside to inside? This is where some seriously-deep water lies.

My search

My search was motivated solely by curiosity and a dissatisfaction with the religious paradigm I had been indoctrinated with, and later, with the scientific paradigm I had been indoctrinated with. I did not know that my search for understanding had anything to do with spirituality, per se, until I started reading about Eastern religions. Even then, the search felt more like a search for psychological and scientific understanding than anything spiritual. It never felt spiritual until I had an initial cosmic consciousness experience. That experience changed me from what I imagined was a scientist to what I imagined was a mystic. Today, I know that what I am is beyond imagining. Anything that I am imagined to be is not what I am, but is included in what I am.

People talk and write about the path to realization

...regarding conceptual thought, in two ways. The first is summed up well by Huang Po (Obaku). Here are some examples:

"Ordinary people all indulge in conceptual thought based on environmental phenomena, hence they feel desire and hatred. To eliminate environmental phenomena, just put an end to your conceptual thinking. When this ceases, environmental phenomena are void; and when these are void, thought ceases. But if you try to eliminate environment without first putting a stop to conceptual thought, you will not succedd, but merely increase its power to disturb you."

"If you would spend all of your time---walking, standing, sitting, or lying down---learning to halt the concept-forming activities of your own mind, you could be sure of ultimately attaining the goal."

We might call this a "via negativa" approach, and most people have no idea how to implement such an approach. The reason I emphasize ATA (rather than ridding oneself of conceptual thought) is because ATA requires psychological presence. It focuses attention upon "what is," and ignores mind completely. With this approach the emphasis is upon Being rather than any effort to ignore thought. The ignoring of thought occurs as a consequence of attentiveness; it is not the primary goal (which is what it might seem from reading Huang Po and others).

As I mentioned earlier, my sister enjoys what she calls "bobber therapy." She and her husband on on fishing trips to an isolated area where they fish from sunup til sundown. She sits in her canoe and silently watches (attends) her fishing line float. She doesn't think about this activity in non-dual terms, but what she is doing is ATA. She is watching "what is" rather than thinking about it. She finds this extremely relaxing, integrative, healing, peaceful, etc., and she comes away from her periods of focused attention highly contented and in a different frame of mind than usual. 

Bird watchers and hunters do the same thing, but, like my sister, they don't usually realize how those activities differ from their usual way of interacting with the world. The Zen student sitting on her cushion following the breath is doing the same thing. 

What all of these people are doing is the same thing that little children do UNconsciously; they are interacting with Reality directly and non-conceptually and they therefore become one-with it, psychologically. 

If someone understands the importance of this kind of direct interaction with the world, and focuses attention upon "what is" for a sustained period of time, thought-created illusions will automatically unwind. Nothing else needs to be done. What ATA is doing is what you call "seeing what in the blazes is going on." In the process of remaining psychologically and non-conceptually present, everything known falls away, and one ends up in the Void, as the Void, in an incomprehensible state of pure being. As Huang Po puts it:

"Our original nature is, in highest truth, devoid of any atom of objectivity. It is void, omnipresent, silent, pure; it is glorious and mysterious peaceful joy--and that is all. Enter deeply into it by awaking to it yourself. That which is before you is it, in all its fullness, utterly complete. Even if you progress, step by step, when you attain realization, you will only be realizing what has been with you all along, and you will have added nothing to it. You will come to look upon all your past efforts as no better than unreal actions performed in a dream."

IOW, ATA has nothing to do with "positive thinking"-like mind approaches (which do nothing to dispel thought-created illusions). If anything, such mind approaches usually add another layer of thought on top of already-existing layers ("Hey, I've been doing positive thinking, and it has greatly-improved my life!" ha ha). 

If my sister returned home after one of her fishing vacations, and continued attending all of the various activities of her life (washing dishes, dining with friends, walking in the park, etc) in the same way that she attends the bobber on her fishing line, time, space, and selfhood would ultimately disappear, and she would find that she already lives in the kingdom of God (which her religious beliefs currently postulate as something that is only experienced after death of the body).

Heaven/Earth, The Kingdom

"Make the smallest distinction,
and heaven and earth are set infinitely apart.
If you wish to see the truth,
then hold no opinions for or against anything.
To set up what you like against what you dislike
is a disease of the mind.
When the deep meaning of things is not understood,
the mind's essential peace is disturbed to no avail....

The more you talk and think about it,
the further astray you wander from the truth.
Stop talking and thinking
and there is nothing you will not be able to know." Seng Stan

"The kingdom of God is both inside of you and outside of you. The kingdom of the Father is spread out upon the earth but people do not see it." Jesus

Accepting yourself

At one extreme there are extroverts who enjoy parties, and at the other extreme are introverts who do not. In my family this is obvious because I'm an ultra extrovert whereas Carol is an ultra introvert (opposites attract--ha ha). Most people fall somewhere between these two extremes. Part of the path to truth involves accepting yourself as you are, and not trying to be something you're not. FWIW, extroverts gain energy from people whereas introverts feel that groups of people suck energy out of them. An extrovert (particularly a storyteller or teacher) may enjoy being the life of the party whereas an introvert usually feels like hiding somewhere. If parties are not enjoyable, why waste any time going to them? 

There are also many other factors involved in whether going to a party is worth the effort, but the main thing is to be true to yourself. I usually consider a party a big success if I can find just one person with whom to have an interesting converation. It's an even bigger success if I can find just one person interested in non-duality. Ha ha! 

Old woman/daughter/monk koan

An old woman heard about a monk who wanted to do a solo meditation retreat. She had a little hut in her backyard and she invited the monk to do his retreat there. Each day she carried a meal out and set it beside the door. The monk remained inside meditating like crazy. After several weeks, the woman began to wonder if the monk had had any kind of significant realization. She had a beautiful daughter, so she sent her daughter out to knock on the monk's door. When the monk opened the door, the daughter gave the monk a suggestive look and said something to him that her mother had instructed her to say. The monk remained like a robot and repeated a famous Buddhist line about how the world of form is nothing but ashes and dust and that a monk must remain unattached to anything. 

The daughter returned to her mother and reported what the monk had said. After hearing what he said, her mother rushed out to the hut, and kicked the monk out. She said, in essence, "You worthless bum. You've been taking up space that someone else could put to much better use." And she beat him with a stick all the way down the road.

I've forgotten the words that the daughter said to the monk, but the koan says, "If you had been the monk how could you have satisfied the old woman?"

What happens after ATA

What happens eventually is that the one who was imagined to be ATA'ing is seen through, and then it doesn't matter what is happening. It is realized that there is no person behind any activity, even ATA. That's why I said that everyone starts out under the illusion that there is a person who is meditating, ATA'ing, etc, but this illusion utlimately collapses, and all twoness comes to an end. From that point on there is neither oneness nor twoness because there is no longer any imagined separation. There is simply washing dishes, mowing the lawn, having dinner with friends, going to work, etc. 

The body/mind will still meditate, ATA, or think, but the previously imagined separation is no longer imagined. The body is intelligent, and it becomes obvious that ordinary everyday life is perfect just the way it is. (If the sage is in the middle of a war zone and is asked, "Is this perfect?" she will respond, "Shut up and pass the ammunition!")

By the time the illusion of selfhood is seen through, imagination has been realized as the culprit that gave rise to the illusion of separation, so imagination plays a much smaller role in the life of the sage than in people who have not seen this. The sage, who is one-with the truth, is content with life however it manifests, acts appropriately, and is no longer jerked around by fantasies and other machinations of mind. Mind is a docile servant providing practical answers to practical questions, and no longer roams around in a world of complex layered abstractions. 

There is no longer any need to control thinking (because the imagined controller has vanished), but the body may enjoy sitting and looking at the world in mental silence (ATA) in the same way that a bird watcher may enjoy watching birds. There is no ulterior purpose in that activity; it is simply what the body does. If someone asks a sage, "Why do you sit and look at the world in silence?" the sage will simply smile.

Koans

Zen Masters in the Rinzai Zen tradition use koans to test their students' existential understanding. All koans have simple answers that can be found by contemplation. Some koans are answered with words and some are answered by a physical action, but thinking is not necessary for finding an answer. In fact, thinking almost always prevents answers from being seen. There are about 2000 formal koans, but tens of thousands of informal koans. here is a typical koan:

If you meet an enlightened woman on the path, how can you greet her with neither words nor silence?

This used to be a formal koan (which could not be discussed in public), but is has become so well known that now it is used to illustrate how koans work. This particular koan contains two mind-hooks--words or phrases which are designed to hook the mind and engage thought. If you see through the koan, the answer is obvious and easy to respond to. 

In an interview setting a teacher might hold up a fist and ask, "What is this?" If a student responds, "It;s a fist," the teacher will say, "YOu are attached to form." If the student then says, "Okay, it;s not a fist," the teacher will say, "Now you are attached to emptiness." What kind of answer is 100% and does not require any thought? In answering, the student must show the teacher that s/he understands the issue.

Koans are existential riddles that help people get out of their heads and into their bodies. Here are a few more to play with:

1. Why do you have two eyes?
2. Why is the sky blue?
3. What is the sound of one hand clapping?
4. Where did you come from?
5. Where are you going?
6. What was your original face before your mother and father were born?
7. If you don't believe in God, Buddha, or any other deities, to whom can you pray?
8. Some people say that Jesus was a pacifist because he said to turn the other cheek, but some people say that he was an activist. One day he walked to the temple and overturned the tables of the money-changers. Was this the act of a pacifist or an activist?
9. What does this shout---Aieeeeeee!----weigh?
10. Who are you, really?
11. A father and son were involved in a bad auto accident. On the way to the hospital the father died of his injuries. The son was rushed to an operating room upon arrival and doctors were called. A neurosurgeon arrived, took one look at the boy and said, "I can't operate on this boy; it's my son." Who was the neurosurgeon?
12. The whole world is on fire. Through what kind of samadhi can you escape?
13. Why can't a strong man lift his own leg?
14. What is the true nature of a dog?

The answer to any existential question is already understood by the body because the body is one-with reality. The problem is that most people live in their heads, so they can't access what the body knows (gnossis). Contemplation takes us out of our heads, and helps us discover what the body already knows. 

As an informal experiment, I asked various people from age 6 to age 66 a list of simple koans. Children could see through many koans whereas older folks could see through none. I later asked different aged groups of people the father/son koan, above. The youngest groups of people could easily see the answer. The ability to see the answer dropped in direct proportion to age. The oldest people could never see through it without considerable contemplation.

Who was the neurosurgeon? The boy's mother. 
How can you greet an enlightened woman with neither words nor silence? Silently wave, hug, shake hands, bow, etc.
The answers to all koans are this simple, direct, and concrete if the intellect doesn't get involved. 

Death

lan Watts used to ask, "When I open my hand, where does my fist go?" Appearances change; that which sees appearances does not. 

An old Zen Master on his deathbed said to some gathered monks, "After I die, I'll still be here, but don't expect me to look the same." Then, he reportedly laughed and died. 

What a teacher does

A teacher is not trying to encourage or convince a student to exchange one view of Reality with another. A teacher is encouraging a student to leave all views of Reality behind and realize that s/he IS Reality. A teacher points only to Presence.